Randomness

Magic etc.

2011-07-17T06:15:00.000-07:00

Normally, as my frequent readers will know, I try to be a funny bastards in my blogs because I don't want to appear as the negative-thoughts-thinker I truly am. It helps, though, like that weird scientific fact says. When you pretend to smile, your body turns into a science lab and creates those happiness enzymethingies. This time, however, no amount of pretend-smiling is going to chase away this sadness: last Tuesday was the release of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows parte deux. Even though I've had an amazing time at the midnight release with all of my friends, I can't be happy about it. The actual magic ended four years ago with the release of the book but then we still had the movies to look forward to. And now even those are gone. All there's left is to roam about the internet, digging up funny facts and background information to keep us obsessed fans satisfied. There's hope for an official encyclopedia but who knows when that will come out? Pottermore is still too much of a mystery to properly look forward to, though if J.K Rowling herself worked on it it's bound to be good. The movies went out with a bang and loads of dignity and maybe in a while I'll be able to fully appreciate it without being reduced to a bunch of tears and sadness.

Goodbye, Harry Potter series, may you give me many more happy childhood memories in the future.

Wendy and the marvy adventures of Jim the Fungus

2011-05-18T01:23:00.001-07:00

Mourn with me, friends! My (second) dearest possession (because really, nothing beats my comfy bed) has gone up to the great Laptop Home in the Sky. It fought bravely in his last hours, even though his keys were falling off, the dvd player was broken and the screen was getting a tad wobbly. Not being able to recharge was what finally did it.

ELMIDA_PC

* 2007

+ 2011

As I skipped off to heartlessly replace my computer on the same afternoon it had died I discovered that some complete idiot has made sure that I won't be doing just that. Because I'm not made of money and I'm not married to Bill Gates I have to get one on credit, which oughn't be a problem unless one has ever gotten in trouble with the Hoogheemraadschap van Rijnland. Or to be more close to the truth, they had trouble with MOI. Have you ever had trouble with MOI? Have you? If so, then you know how they must have SHIVERED behind their cute little desks. If not, oh okay. To prevent tl;dr: they charged me for taxes I didn't have to pay so I didn't pay and they most likely registered me at the bureau that prevents people with debts taking loans. Now, I don't have debts because in the end they came crying to me that they had made a mistake and I indeed did not have to empty my wallet over their greedy little wrinkly hands but that's not what the bureau thinks. I think. Because it takes a bloody week for them to figure that out. Honestly, have we gone back to the Dark Ages where it took a trillion and a half years to get a message delivered because the only option was going on horseback and then stop to take a rest at a shady inn called the Decapitated Leprechaun and get nearly burgled by brigands and shout LO, COMETH AT ME, BROTHER! and then finally arrive and that's just one way? I thought this was the 21st century where people clickityclick with their little computer mousies and the required data immediately pops on screen. But I was mistaken, obviously, and thus laptopless for at least another week. Sob sob sob.

Oh well, to kill time and forget about the awful loss of my laptop (actually it's because I get fired if I don't show up) I went to work like I normally did. It was quite nice really because all the poor kiddies are facing Judgment Day so they emptied some of the classrooms and places the chair and tables in the gym. That doesn't only give me enough space to do romantic ballroom dancing with my loving broom but it also gives me time to clean things I normally don't have time for. Like, you know, the tables, which normally you should be able to clean but my bosses are bonkers. And I was just minding my own business when I saw him. The most humongous moldy sandwich I have ever seen and believe me when I say I have seen many, many moldy sandwiches in my cleaning lady carreer. Honestly, it was enough fungus to provide someone with antibiotics for a lifetime. A normal person, that is, with me it would last for about a year. And just as I was staring in the bin in awe, I heard it.

"Hello."
I looked around, confused, because my deary collegues weren't there yet.
"Yes, hello, down here."
And then I saw it. The modly sandwich. The pile of fungus. Staring at me.
"Oh." I said. "Hello?"
"Yes, hello. Don't worry, I'm not really a talking modly sandwich. It's just the horrible smell and intoxicating fumes from the bins that have finally made you snap and go mad." said the talking moldy sandwich.
"Oh."
"Yes. It was bound to happen one day, wasn't it?"
I stared into the bin, directly at the talking sandwich and nodded.
"I suppose so, yes."
"Well then. I'm Jim. Actually I'm Jimbocius Francisco of Rottingville but you can call me Jim."
"Oh. Ok. Well when. Jim. Jimbo. Hop into my garbage bag, why don't you?"
And Jim hopped into the garbage bag, snuggly amongst the other molds and fungi, and I took him for a stroll along the hallways. I soon had to stop and retch because of Jim's awful BO but I thought it would be rude to say anything so I didn't. And then I saw a cookie wrapper stuck behind one of the lockers and I said to Jim,
"Hold on, I need to clean this up."
And I pulled it free from behind the lockers. But lo, there came more, and I pulled out more. And more. And more. And there just came no end it it.
"Blimey." said Jim.
"I know." I replied.
For a moment we just looked at it in awe. Behind the lockers was about three years worth of empty cookie wrappers, like someone's secret stash. I had discovered a treasure. Although a gross treasure.
"It looks like one of those magic tissues. You know. The ones magicians have. That they just keep pulling and pulling and there comes no end to it." said Jim.
I stared at Jim blankly.
"You are awfully smart for a moldy sandwich."
"I know." said Jim. "It's a burden, really."
And I kept on cleaning and all that time Jim the Fungus kept me company as he didn't really have a choice because he had no limbs after all because he was just a sandwich and he was in the garbage bag. But like always it soon became 7 PM and I really had to go. And as I was dragging the garbage bag along I said to Jim:
"I'm awfully sorry, Jimbo, but I really have to go home now because I'm awfully hungry and there's dinner waiting for me."
"Oh, I see. Well I suppose I was more lucky than any moldy sandwich anyway. Off you go, then."
"Bye Jim. Oh wait, one more question. Was I talking to the fungus or to the sandwhich?"
Jim just stared at me for a moment and was silent.
"It's difficult. We sort of fused together. We're just one big moldy sandwich."
"Oh." I said, ashamed. "I'm sorry. It's just that I haven't met many moldy sandwiches before."
"It's okay," replied Jim "That happens to me a lot. Well, by then."
"Bye."
And I chucked the garbage bag and Jim along with it in the container.

Well of course it didn't actually happen like that because it went more like oh my good heavens what on earth is this how could anyone have collected so much mold oh god this is the most traumatizing thing I've experienced all week and Baby Jesus have mercy on my soul it's only Tuesday yet and then I emptied the bin and went on with it. Though the supply of neverending cookie wrappers was true. And maybe the part about me being mad.

Like a loon on loon tablets

2011-05-03T01:28:00.000-07:00

My, my, my. I should probably get a medal for procrastinating, my last blog being posted on the 27th of December. But then again, it's not as if I had anything interesting to tell you lot about. The most important people in my life are all aware of my personal dramas and agonies from first-hand telling and wouldn't really care to read about it in a blog post and the rest would just... not care in the first place. And you might think: "Why don't you just post something more positive, then?". But really, if I wanted to tell you all fairy tales I would direct you to my other blog, where I publish my 'novel'. And that was indeed a very non-subtle hint for you all to go and check that out right now. Yes, now. Don't procrastinate. Procrastinating is bad for you. Ahum.

Well, as there is nothing to mention on either the school, work or social life department I'll just get on to the medical ride of happiness I've been going through for years now. Of course the 'happiness' was another clever trick of my brilliant sarcasmiosity. I still don't enjoy being a half-cripple much, especially since it's now bothering me in my attempts to become a super-thin super model of beauty and glamour. But! As of last week, there are two certain leather-and-cork flaps in my life that have vaguely started to uncripple me. Only slightly, but ever so much. For once, I don't walk like a loony duck anymore. Well, just a tiny bit (and I'm still a loon), but what if I ever get my identity changed by getting a new face and people would want to recognize me? They couldn't even identity me by my walk anymore. So I'm keeping a bit of the duckwalk in there. But I must say, my insoles are helping my knees quite a bit. Maybe there's hope and I'll actually be able to walk more than a kilometer without pain!

And there's also the loon tablets! Or actually they're just allergy-fighting tablets. But they are my most precious property of all at the moment. Hey fever season is doing the full on boogie-woogie in this time of the year and not being able to breathe + hear + not sneeze for ten minutes does get quite annoying after a while. I was on a homeopathic solution for those wittle pwoblems, but since those things are basically just fake medicines with fancy stickers of nature and herbs on the package it didn't really help much. But these pills... Woah! Shazam! They are amazing! I was instantly cured of my eternal sniffing and sneezing but what's best is... I can cuddle my little bunny rabbit again! Well, I could always do that, but that was only if I didn't mind not being able to breathe for the following hours. With the tablets taken, I can scoop the little (actually he's huge, he's half-bunny half-rhinoceros) fur ball out of his cage and cuddle and pet and hug and not die of allergies. It's amazing! A whole new world opened up for me! It has quite possibly restored my chances of ever becoming a crazy cat lady in the future!

The glory of being able to pet animals almost makes me forget the actual reasons I got those medicines. Because really, the doctor hardly cares about the dramatic Romeo-and-Jullietesque story of me and my bunny, or the fact that flowers and trees and grass are evil and want to kill me. What he cares about (and me too actually) is the fact that my body is slowly being devoured by wild-growth infections and that it is probably caused by an allergy of some sorts. Anyway, I have to go back there in two weeks and tell him that all my problems are fixed, but sadly my bladder still hurts and is still being as annoying as if was before I got those tablets. Maybe they'll help on a longer term and maybe the other infections will stay away now, but my bladder is so far not joining the health salsa. Samba. Rumba. Exotic dancing.

Anyway, I'll get back to the ever so important job of delivering mail now. But without sniffling and sneezing this time. See you in five months for the next blog!

Creative spasms

2010-12-27T12:12:00.000-08:00

I seem to be having those lately and I find it hard to decide whether I'm happy about it or not. Of course one should always look on the bright side of things, but when those creative spasms involve having to use a drawing tablet and one's pen to go with the drawing tablet is still missing, it turns rather frustrating and nasty. On the other hand, when those creative spasms come in the form of writing, I get very happy. Last week I wrote a review on the latest Golden Sun: Dark Dawn game after finishing and I must say, I'm rather proud of how it turned out (the review, the game was rather disappointing). And it just happens to be so that today I've written two whole pages in Word on my novel. Guys, I think I might finish a chapter eventually!

One of my less positive spasms was the decision of quitting school. Again. It just happened to be so that my uncle decided to ask how I was doing, mainly in school, and he is one of the few people I just can't lie to. For a very long time I've been telling others and myself that things are all going well, while that is just one big lie. Mostly the keep up the appearance because I wouldn't want to look like an utter failure in the eyes of others, but also hugely because I had to convince myself I still really liked this education. And I did really like the communication parts, but there was barely anything of that going on. And then I wondered whether I'm really such a cold hearted sales bitch and I came to the conclusion that I'm not. So I quit, also because I was going to have to pay 5000 Euros of tuition fees per year from next year on and I really can't afford that. So now I'm on the hunt for a job and so far things are going pretty good.

There is one very important thing my time at this education has given me, though, and it has nothing to do with academic aspects. It just happened to be so that one of my classmates is befriended to a very old friend of mine that I hadn't spoken to in, well, years. Our mutual commenting on his Facebook page brought us together again and soon more of my old friends came back in my life. The tsunami of nostalgia is still a bit hard to deal with, but I can't say I'm not happy about this happening! It was very stupid of me back then to just kick them out of my life and I'm glad they're so forgiving as to have me back.

In the meanwhile the snow is slowly starting to drive me crazy, especially since Christmas has now passed and the Winter Wonderland doesn't really add anything to the atmosphere anymore. It's not just become a huge annoyance, especially for us poor mail delivering people. And really, Landal/Centerparcs, 70 kilos of books? Please. Ugh, hopefully tomorrow will be one of the last times I'll have to risk my life on the ice track with my bicycle, on the one side because I hope the snow will be gone asap and on the other side because that'll mean I finally got a better job.

Anyway. Back to writing some more on my Novel Of Fail of which I can hopefully soon present you the first chapter. Adieu!

Oh come there once looking

2010-12-05T09:23:00.000-08:00

I love Sinterklaas! But sadly, it'll over again by tomorrow... Seriously, time flies like a jet engine. Which is good for moments that aren't as pleasurable, I admit, but the fun moments are over just like that as well. But for insane nationalists like me, Sinterklaas, WK and Kongininnedag are my favourite times of the year. And that's without even considering the pepernoten and chocoladeletters and marsepein..............

Blegh, school isn't going nearly as good as I thought. The only things I've passed are the Communication test, Project and Presenting. And of course this has Leonidas-kicked me into such a pit of lack of confidence that I'm going to have to go back to the shrink. Which I don't like. At all. At least my classmates appeared to be less horrible than they seemed at first.

Last week there was a lot I wanted to say over here, but most of it was either too angsty and whiny or it made no sense whatsoever. So this will be it.

Impatience strikes once moar

2010-11-04T09:35:00.000-07:00

Probably some of my worst bad habits are my insane impatience and greediness. If I see something I want, I WANT it and I want it INSTANTLY. Whether it's a beautiful person or a book I've been waiting for to be released for over a year. Talking about the last subject, I'm sitting here writhing in agony because it's not arrived yet. Everyone I know and likes the series already has the book and in fact most of them already are finished reading it. It's so unfair! Last year I ordered the book on Bol.com because they're always on time with their deliveries, but the book didn't arrive in time because of delivery problems. I thought I'd learnt from that so I ordered the book at the local bookstore but now it seems all the bookstores have trouble getting the books delivered and BOL.COM HAS A 100% GUARANTEE IT WILL ARRIVE TOMORROW IF I ORDER IT NOW. FFFFFffuuuu--. And why do I not order it at Bol.com? Well, I have a 15 Euro book voucher which they don't accept over there. And next to impatient and greedy I'm also stingy.

On the more positive side, school is going great. The Project was rounded off with a sufficient grade and so was the Presenting course. If everything's going right Reporting, Spelling and Communication are sufficient as well which means I should have earnt 11 ECs out of 60 so far! Doesn't that kick so much ass? Who knows, I might even get my Propedeuse in one year!

Last Sunday was the second NGamer Forum meeting and it was absolutely amazing! We went to Utrecht where we first had a couple of drinks at an insanely expensive restaurant and then we went to the bowling ally where we did some pictionairy before we actually got to the bowling. Unlike last time, my bowling skills were nowhere to be found and I ended up 17th out of 21 :C Thankfully the people who had shown up were really really cool (even the ones I hadn't met before) and the traditional visit to the pizzeria was really cool and delicious. Mozzarella pizza omnomnomnom.

Now I'll get back to sorting the FUCKING BLOODY SHIT MAIL and being in agony over not having Towers of Midnight wahhhhhhhh.

Xena the Special Effects Princess

2010-10-22T02:47:00.001-07:00

So, it's Friday afternoon once again and I've once again created my messy private spot in the school's media center. This is starting to become a habit, heh. In contrary to normal blog moments I'm in a rather happy/satisfied mood. The dreadful project was rounded off this week; with a sufficient grade. It's really hard to bring across how much of a relief that is to me. A bit of a less of big surprise is my "more than sufficient" grade for presenting class! The teacher didn't even mention one point for me to improve, yay! Nintendo Benelux can be proud of me. Sadly, they won't know and if they did they would sue me for copyright infringement :')

Last week I was watching SyFy Channel (nerd alert, but I like it) and one of the most nostalgic shows ever was on: Xena the Warrior Princess! Seriously, I used to have such a bad addiction to that series... I just loved her weapon, that round throwy thing (is it a chakram?) en Gabrielle, her friend. And it's almost as good as it used to be when I was young, except now I notice the AWFUL special effects and how obviously fake it is :( I mean, come on, when a rope bridge falls down and Gabrielle is hanging off a cliff, Xena can suddenly somersault (why does she do that all the time anyway?) over the RAVINE to reach her? Lol. But it was still fun. And Lucy Lawless' legs underneath that short leather skirt.................... No complaints here.

Oh, and because I constantly forget to watch Moonlight on TV, I just.. .... eh, made sure I could watch the series whenever I wanted to, but sadly it made me discover the show only has 16 episodes in total because of the stoopid Hollywood strikes and it being canceled. Hurr, I finally like a series (and it's a GOOD one, with COOL vampires) and they do this to me! >:C

Tonight is party time with Kees and Kees and some more Kezen again, and I'm really looking forward to that. I have no doubts about it that we're going to have a great time again! I AM really curious what's going to be for dinner because normally I'd be eating fries. Mmmmm... Fries....

Also, I've got this music stuck in my head and you WILL share my misery. In fact, these were the actual words Adam said to me when he sent me the link and... CURSE HIM!

Click me!!! DO ITTTTT!

And last but not least:

IT'S FALL BREAK. FUCK YEAH.

The Misty Mountains

2010-10-12T00:53:00.000-07:00

Yeah, that's where I live now. It's pretty misty outside, which probably means it's cold and moist outside... ... Do not want :( There's 50 kilos of mail waiting to be delivered. Normally I'd be done with one round but we have to deliver these stoopid Postcode Loterij agenda's which weigh a TON. Waaaah, waaaah, whine, whine. There, I'm done.

I could whine a whole lot more about, surprise, school but I'm not even going to bother with those people anymore. I've done my share, deal with it.

Yesterday kind of taught me the lesson that barely five hours of sleep per night isn't exactly healthy. I already had trouble keeping my eyes open during certain lessons (and not even just because it's so extremely boring) and in the public traffic, but when I nearly fell asleep while CYCLING... Yeah. Guess I'm going to have to go to bed even earlier :( When I came home I decided to take a one hour nap because there was still LOADS of things to do, but I didn't set my alarm properly (5 pm and 15:00 aren't exactly the same) so I didn't wake up in time for dinner, lol. And mum let me sleep, which was pretty sweet.

Ahhhh, it's getting so nice and comfortably warm in here... I love you, central heating!

And yesterday was International Coming Out Day, no matter what Wikipedia says. I forgot to hang the anti gay bashing posting on the window, but I think it's pretty clear for the neighborhood that we're against that, lol. It makes me happy to know there's a day to show everyone there ARE people who support the LGBT community, though that should actually be done every day. Paul de Leeuw's show was pretty funny yesterday as well, heh. Yeah, go us.

Another rather positive blog, let's keep that up.

Go blood! (Happy blog, very rare)

2010-10-08T03:04:00.000-07:00

Guess what, it's Friday afternoon again and I'm having a 3 hour break (seriously) before my last two dreadfully boring hours of class will start. It's pretty much like this every week and it's getting a bit annoying, but at least I'm not as lame as my classmates of which the majority just went home. Even though the difference between being home at 1 and being home at 6 is great, I prefer just going to class and picking up the knowledge.

Ha! My last presentation was awful, but this time it was GREAT! We had to tell something about a company or organisation and I chose to talk about Sanquin, the bloodbank. I can talk about that for hours in the first place, but apparently I'm very good at convincing people of things. (Maybe I should start a cult? That could be interesting.) My PowerPoint presentation looked great according to the teacher/classmates which was probably because I used Sanquin's "huisstijl". This was the first time I ever made a proper PowerPoint, actually. Maybe a hidden talent has been uncovered? But what made me happiest is that after the presentation two people came to me and told me they were now seriously considering to sign up as blood donors. This makes me a happy Kees!

You know what also makes me a happy Kees?

1) It's Friday!

2) That means: WEEKEND!

3) And fries for dinner <3

4) Sleeping in, ahh...

It's all great fun today, with the exception of waking up at 5 AM and the woman next to me in the train barfing all over. (No, she did it in a bag, but still, the smell, omg). I offered her a peppermint because I'm so awesome and I remember how awful barf tastes. And I had a few laughs with the classmates sitting next to me in class, huzzah! If only I could go home now and I wouldn't have to do Exercase tonight, waah!

And tonight Moonlight's on, which I really like. Mick and Beth are both such nice characters and it doesn't often happen that I like the main character of a series, let alone two of them.

Now that's a good question

2010-10-06T13:32:00.000-07:00

Gosh, I'm sitting here and wondering why I'm such a emotional wreckage. It started out as a rhetorical question, but then I came up with a few possible answers.

A) Because I'm a woman
B) Because I've got my period
C) Because I fail

But then I started thinking about those answers and I realized something vital was missing:

D) All of the above.

And it's so stupid, you know. I'd be feeling a lot better if I cared less about what complete strangers think of me. Why should I be bothered about my classmates not liking my style of music, or why should I be insulted when they add everyone on Hyves except me? When did I start caring about Hyves and my number of friends in the first place? Man, have I become shallow. Luckily the sane part of me, it seems to take a holiday once every month, keeps reminding me of the fact that I have plenty of friends, and the best I can wish for, and I really SHOULDN'T care about all those little selfish twatwaffles.

Oh hey, there's good news too. I thought I was gaining wait after this disastrously sinful month, but I actually lost a kilo! Wow!

Why am I always complaining? Can't I ever write a happy blog? Yeah. Maybe. One day. In the future. I'll let you know.

Cry me a river

2010-09-30T01:42:00.000-07:00

Boohoo, more project group trouble. They're all very nice people and I really like this company idea we have (though I have absolutely no idea what a beauty parlor has to do with the tourism branch), but some people really need to calm down a little. Seriously, woman, we can't help you start on this stuff with such haste that you want to finish it next week. We also can't help the fact that you've decided to assign so many tasks to yourself that it almost looks like the rest of us are doing nothing at all. And really, I don't think you have the right to get THIS angry at me for not finishing the financial plan when you haven't even bothered to send me the e-mail with the information. If you're being so responsible and great, you should have been sure I actually received the e-mail so I could get to work. But wait, you can't, can you? Because you haven't even BOTHERED to ASK for my e-mail address. And if you don't say anything, how am I supposed to know I was supposed to receive an e-mail? Right. I'm going to get started on the financial plan today, like the official school planner says, and you're going to receive it when it's DONE. And I personally think you'll probably agree with me that it's better to wait a day or two longer for it than for me to finish this with haste, making the quality go backwards.

So much frustration on school, blegh. It almost makes you wonder if it's even worth it. But then when I sit in Law class and it's all interesting and useful to know, it makes me happy again. Talking about Law class, we suddenly had a pop quiz. That was a bit of a nasty surprise, since I've only attended one working class and two lectures. Not by personal choice, mind you, the first time I was ill (surprise, two infections) and the second time the train didn't show up. But nevertheless, the test was relatively easy and I'm curious about the results.

Haha, one of the questions was funny. It asked what type of law was involved in the case: Henk votes for the VVD. I encircled the right answer (I hope), but wrote something next to it:

"Henk is a loser, thanks Henk! >:C"

I'm so funny.

I couldn't have bought my new boots at a better time of the year. Oh my gosh, it's so insanely cold! When I got downstairs this morning it was only 16 degrees in the living room. When it's 16 degrees outside, you put on a COAT. So, whether there was going to be whining and nagging or not, I turned on the central heating. Brrr! And it's not one bit better outside. Ah, the positive side of it is that it wakes me up a bit when switching trains in Deventer.

Ahh, tomorrow. There is going to be a long, long, long train trip... Why isn't Maastricht a bit closer? But it's probably going to be worth it, sleepovers with the Kezen is always a lot of fun, and they're probably even better in a really pretty city. I could really use the social interactions!

I have to go to the dietitian again on Wednesday and I'm not really sure she and I will be satisfied with what we'll see. It's been a really horrible month. First there was my sister's birthday so you eat everything that's forbidden, and then when you've eaten bad stuff you're like "Pff, what does it matter, I might as well continue with it", and then I got pretty sick for 1,5 week... Bluh. But at least I'm doing well again, and I think the dietitian will probably understand that everyone sometimes has a bad month. Right........?!

Salt in the wound

2010-09-24T02:38:00.000-07:00

Luckily my ear is feeling better, and even luckier for me it popped this morning, so now I can hear with two ears again. VICTORY! I must say, you quickly forget how insanely loud the world is when you can hear at full capacity again. You know when the world is especially loud? When you're in a train packed so full it has to leave a couple of people behind on the station. But because I'm awesome, I wasn't one of them, AHAH!

But then there was a rather sour moment in this day. We had to do a presentation. That's not bad, you say? Well actually, it's proven by research that people fear presenting more than they fear death. I'm not one of those people (in exchange, I am terrified of death), but I AM one of those people that likes throwing around random facts at completely random moments. Anyway. The presentation felt alright to me, even if my presenting partner was shy as hell, made a hideous PowerPoint presentation and could hardly utter a word. And then it was time for feedback. Conclusion:

They think I'm too much of a teacher.

What? Everyone, including the teacher thinks this, and yet they think differently at teacher school. Well actually, the teachers at teacher school thought I was a good teacher as well, except for my TP coaches. And then one of my classmates came with the comment that he thought that I can explain thinks very well, that I am nice to listen to, but I am much too insecure. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what they call rubbing salt in the wound. That is what they call kicking someone in the already hurt shins. He didn't know, of course, but it hurt so much that class quickly turned emotional and thus very emberassing. Without knowing he gave me the precise words the TP coaches gave me before they decided I was a lousy teacher and should leave the teaching branche altogether. The teacher did give me some very comforting words; she said that switching from teacher school to Communcation, where one deals with adults and not with rioting teenagers, may have been a very good choice to make excellent use of my presenting talent. But for heaven's sake, that doesn't mean I don't miss teacher school and that I don't still want to be a teacher, and that I'm reminded of my shattered dream every day because I still attend the same school. And then this bastard sitting next to me in the media centre has the history teacher education books I used to use and... Blurgh.

On a happier note, it's almost weekend and I've discovered something dangerously delicious at the Albert Heijn To Go; ricewiches. Normally they're expensive as hell, but since they were 1,50 this time I figured I'd try them and ooohh. I wish I hadn't, because this is going to hurt both my wallet and diet.

It's two slices of onigiri-like sushi things, and then there's stuff in the middle (I had chicken). So, just a sandwich, but in stead of bread they use sushi rice. And omnomnom, it's so incredibly de-li-cious. Maybe I can make it at home. I've made sushi before!

And now I'm sitting here, waiting, because class doesn't start until 1:30 and I'm boohohoooored. And the situation is like this every Friday. Do not want. I would be so happy if they could just move the last two hours :( But that's probably never going to happen.

My blog definitely needs a new design; but how? A noob, I am it.

EDIT: OH MY GOSH *heart* Why didn't I know they had this template earlier? This is SO me. Though maybe a little dark. But definitely better than the awful pink.

LASS MICH! >:C

2010-09-20T20:30:00.000-07:00

By request, another blog from me.

I only want to make one comment regarding my last blog: TP coaches can be deceiving. And that's not funny.

Angry Germans on my TV, shrieking the entire time. If anything is a good thing to wake up at 5 in the morning, it's that. Usually when I get up that early, my dad is up as well, and I don't know how he can STAND it but he always watched the German TV. Now there's this show on about a blond slutty girl who walks around in the shortest shorts ever and all she does is SHRIEK. Shriek at her boyfriend, shriek at her dad, shriek at her mother, shriek at her photographer. And really, my German isn't bad, but this show is so stoopid that I can't made head nor tails of it. What on earth is this about? Yeah. My morning wake up call.

Oh god, now they're playing Singstar. Someone shoot the TV.

Hurrdurr, I've been drawing and colouring my moodboard for SLB by hand all evening, but then suddenly a classmate calls me to inform me that SLB is cancelled for tomorrow :G! All that work for nothiiiiiiing~! But then again, now I only have to go to school 'till 11 AM or something so I'll be home early to start with the mail, lala.

I still can't hear a thing with my left ear and there's this really annoying beep in it. Don't you love ear infections? You know what's even greater about infections? You get antibiotics. You know what antibiotics do? They make your pee smell like it came right from hell, oh god. TMI? Don't care, it's 5 AM, I can say whatever the phuck I want *snobby face*

At least, despite my ear infection, I can now listen to music again! I couldn't take my MP3 player on the train yesterday, yeah well basically I could, but I had no earphones. Somehow they ended up on the floor, when mother was vacuum cleaning the floor... And... ... Do I really still need to describe what happened?

Anyhow, have to get dressed like lightning speed now, because suddenly 5 AM is 5:39 AM D: Oh snap.

Well, wans't this huuuuugely interesting? Haha.

GOODBYE.

I'm doing homework! Really!

2010-03-18T05:56:00.000-07:00

OHMYGODTHESUNISSHININGANDITFEELSLIKESPRINGOMGITMAKESMESOHAPPY!

This is what the first gorgeous rays of sun are doing to me. And I haven't even been outside yet today, hawhawhaw. I was yesterday, I went to the ever so spectacular market with my mummy-dear and when we got home my poor bunny was staring at me with his poor... ... bunny-eyes? He has long hair which needs to be combed daily, but it hardly happens once a year. I've got a semi-good excuse though. If I go near the animal I get horrible spastical sneezing attacks and moments later I can't breathe anymore. Oh and rashes too. But yesterday I decided it was enough! I got the poor animal out of his cage and cut his hair and cut his nails and let it walk outside in the garden. It helped me rake the garden by digging holes and it was really cute 'n all. Dawww, bunny :heart:

That's not my foot, but that is my bunny!

My sister and a friend of hers and I went to the circus yesterday. It was really cool! They had tigers and elephants and doggies and all sorts of stuff and A GIRAFFE. Which was so cute cute cute cute cute. What was a lot less cute was that I was sitting on the edge, at the front... And then the clowns came... And oh god. I don't want to remember it.

And I'd better not get the Red Week of Joy tomorrow because then I can't go swimming. Swimming, you say? Why yes. If I can I'm swimming twice a week now! It's horribly expensive but it's exercise I can live with. It trains all my muscles and it also helps me get rid of my aquaphobia. If I really want to lose weight I have to cut on every cookie I want to eat though. Meh. And take walks on the days I don't go swimming... Blegh, I absolutely don't feel like walking but it's going to be less horrible if the weather stays beautiful like this. One day I'll be my sexy self again.

This blog wouldn't be a blog of mine if there wasn't at least one thing I ranted about. And what's every student's favourite subject to rant about? Yes! School! That idiotic dean is just NOT mailing me back! It wasn't an important question or anything... It only involved me being able to get my P or not... Solely depending on his reply... Seriously, how hard is it to click the fucking reply button and push a few buttons? If he doesn't feel like replying he can at least send me the name of someone who DOES! My incredibly amazing school once again decided to plan an exam at 6:30 in evening. Which will last until 8:30. Which mean I can either not get home at all or I'll be home at like, 12:30. Which is RIDICULOUS! Now I have to make that exam next period, meaning I've had to skip this exam for TWO PERIODS simply because it's planned at such a stupid time. Feh. They're not rid of me yet.

And more school ranting; I still have a lot of Onderwijskunde to do *sob* I really hate that subject. It's all very interesting, but those subjects. FFFFF! And my historisch werkstuk needs to die. DIE!

On a happier school-related note; I ABSOLUTELY LAV MY NEW TP SCHOOL :heart:

And now I'm hungry and I'm going to eat a matzes.

PS: I wasn't really doing homework, you know. Everytime I attempt to do my homework I end up writing a blog :B

3000 BC

2010-01-27T13:10:00.000-08:00

So tomorrow is the ancient history resit. I epically failed that test last time even though I studied my arse off. It's not going to be any different this time. I know it. You know why? Because these tests make no SENSE. We have to study a period of 3000 BC to 500 AD. Do you know how incredibly fucking long that is? Do you honestly think you're going to successfully test our knowledge on a test that has EIGHT QUESTIONS?!

Not only is that horribly ineffective, but there's also no way we can study for this. It's near impossible to remember EVERYTHING into details (and I've seen this test before, you want insane details on insanely unimportant topics), which we're required to do because the questions on the test are going to be a complete surprise. UGH, I can't express in words how angry you make me, honestly. It was the same bloody story for your Middle Ages test. It's a period from 500 to 1500 AD, where all sorts of important things happen like the fall of the Roman Empire and the Germanic tribes and the feudal system... And what do we get? Eight questions on THE MOTHERFUCKING CHURCH... This may be a christian school, okay, but fuck. We're not going to be teaching our students about the coronation of Some English King and what the pope had to do with this. And ESPECIALLY not about the Gregorian Reformationsomethings. Thank goodness I passed that test (though it was most likely a pity grade, I know you), or I would have punched your nose bone right up your brain. I kid you not.

Hurray, failure anxiety.

That breaks my clomp.

2010-01-14T10:14:00.000-08:00

Dear hot teacher,

You know how irresistable you are with your beautiful eyes and beautiful hair and beautiful everything, but this time you've messed up so badly that I want to punch you in the face no matter what. Really badly. Honestly, they should take away your diploma, rip it to pieces and then send you back to school. How you can actualy get away with being an extremely lousy and incompetent teacher at a TEACHER'S SCHOOL is a big mystery to me. The good thing is, if even you can manage to get your diploma and officially get to teaching, then I definitely can. Because at least I know that a teacher is not meant to destroy every bit of trust the student has in him/her by being a two-faced prick.

First I go to you and cry, because your subject just happens to be extremely nasty and involved a ridiculously large research report. You can't help that, I know, but for heaven's sake, you could at least have tried to make it more bearable. How do you spell that even? Anyhow. When a student with such immense failure anxiety approaches you in class CRYING, don't pull off your ridiculous fake sympathy trick! Don't promise help and support when you're eventually just going to let them fall and let them drown in their own anxiety and helplessness. But hey. You're new to this career too, so we can forgive you that, eventually.

Or I maybe WOULD have been able to if you didn't pull the exact same filthy trick on the ENTIRE CLASS. This assignment was actually not so bad. It wasn't hard and it made sense. It linked back to what we're about to teach to our students in the future. So today was Judgment Day; time for presentations. Because I've been a bit of a lazy bum (nothing new here) during the creation of the 'lesbrief', I would do the presentation. Normally I'm not bothered at all by having to present something. I'm going to be a teacher after all, if by now I'm still not able to stand there and have a talk, I'd be in the wrong school. Anyway. As the entire class does their presentation, YOU BURN THEM DOWN COMPLETELY, scaring the shit out of me. Really nothing they do was actally right and it seems majority is going to fail this paper. Then our presentation. You nod in approval all the time and make positive comments (I'll forgive you for talking when I was talking), which makes me and my fellow dear groupmembers feel very pleased. Your feedback to our presentation was the most positive of all! Cheers plz! The only thing we have to change, you say, are our footnotes and the fact you don't see any info sources. Oops, we forgot to mail you those while we thought we had. We explain this to you and once again you are calm, understanding, patient, positive. So we have to send in the sourcelist by mail and you'll check them. That seems actually decent! Class then asks you when the resuls will be in and you claim full-heartedly: "Oh no no no, definitely not this week. Next week at LEAST, I'll need time to properly read through these papers." We accept this, though we are impatient.

HOWEVER... During our next class, ten flipping minutes LATER, you've been able to send everyone an e-mail with their grade. Except the one group that failed their lesbrief because it was utter crap, AND OURS, because "your sourcelist is missing, you have made no footnotes and you have no cover". EXCUSE ME? No COVER?! Are you going to be bullshitting about things like THAT? So first you tell us how beautiful and amazing our lesbrief is and that you can't tell us yet whether it's sufficient or not, and tell us you will await our sourcelist. And ten minutes later you've already decided you can't grade our work because this and that and all that lark is missing.

Motherfucker, if you don't have a spine and can't keep your promises to your students, then don't say anything at all. Seriously, you're destroying our faith in you. People are starting to become afraid of you because we have no idea what you're going to do or say. You're two-faced. Anything can happen. And usually that's not the good thing. FFFFF!

I'll eagerly be awaiting your "feedback" on my the research paper that made me cry and I hope it'll be as positive as you told me in class. However, knowing you, you're probably going to tell me things in my paper you just said were fine are going to be the F of me.

Much love,
Your secret admirer.

PS: Stop being so inhumanly hot. All I can do is stare at you and imagine having sex. That doesn't help me concentrate on your horribly boring subject.

Derp

2009-12-20T14:40:00.001-08:00

Time for a new blog! Not that my life is so terribly interesting that I actually have to keep up with it, but I personally quite like blogging. When I was young I always kept a diary, I still have the whole pile of it. A while ago I was reading back into them and seriously, I was such an angsty, whiny kid, LOL! Glad to know nothing has changed.

Every day I take the same long, boring route to school. Having to take the intercity makes the trip slightly less dreadful because those are so much more comfortable and having to get out in Deventer in the freezing cold prevents me from falling asleep. Last week, however, I decided to take a whole new detour. Via Germany.... Sometimes I amaze myself with my intelligence, really. Only a genius like me could have pulled off something like this. I had to switch trains in Hengelo and take the international train from Germany to Almelo and Deventer. I feared I was going to miss the connection because we had a slight delay so I was glad to see the train was still there. So I took a ninja-dash across the platform, Superwoman-jumped into the train and performed a victory dance before I took a (not so) comfortable seat. But just as the doors were sliding to shut, I felt my doom crash upon me....

This was the fucking train TO Germany, not FROM. Insert facepalm here. I had no idea WHERE in Germany we were going and how long it was going to take. All I knew was that it was in GODDAMN GERMANY and I had no money on me. Bawww! So I went to pout and sob at the security guys in my very best German and all they did was laugh. Apparantly it happens quite often and all I had to do was wait for an hour and a half (!!!!!!!!) in the freezing cold for the train back to Hollanda. Eventually I was even in time for school!

And the shit with my school is -finally- arranged. I'm going to switch to History in September and then do an English minor. That way I can take my time to get my propedeuse and re-do my teaching practise.

And really. If you're trying to give of subtle hints, I'm not getting them. I've really lost track of what you're trying to say. Stop confusing me.

Last but not least, my sister and I had a snowball fight! I tried to add a photo, but Blogger is being a betch.

It's still December, so...

2009-12-07T09:16:00.001-08:00

I still have a valid reason to whine and be emotional. Because everyone has a winter depression, right?

I can't stand the fact that now I'm really giving school my all, some administrative bitchery is going to ruin this or me. I should be glad though, at least the dean finally managed to send me back an e-mail, though the news he brought wasn't exactly something to do a happy-dance over. I have to unenroll from English and sign up for parttime History. But guys, I don't want to do parttime History! I'm a fulltime student, I just have to sign up for this bullcrap because you can't get your papers straight! How can you simply cancel a whole education? What about those tons of students who want to change majors because of the minor they've chosen? You're forcing them to stay at an education they don't want to do! All I want is to change my subject. In stead of following English I'll be joining History. Is that so hard to comprehend? Apparantly. Argh! Bureaucracy! I'll have to arrange shit with the examboard myself if I want to get anything done because the dean doesn't know shit either.

On a happier note, I really enjoyed playing 'secret Sinterklaas'. Because we're all adults, we no longer place our shoes to receive presents, but that's such a shame! Coming downstairs and finding a little present in your shoe is fun for people of all ages. So I secretely bought chocolate letters for my mother, sister and myself (There wasn't even a letter 'w'! So I bought the 'e' of Elmida) and those little mints for my dad and giftwrapped them. When everyone was in bed I got their shoes and placed them at the front door with the present inside, hehehe! Everyone seemed pleasantly surprised. We spent Sinterklaasavond with Ik Houd Van Holland, which was absolutely hilarious and after that we've been playing Cluedo until past midnight. Ack, I love that game!

Whoop, let's end this blog with that positive moment. *Thumbs up*

I shant bow down to you

2009-11-26T05:54:00.000-08:00

Now my old quarrels finally are settled and new friendships made, new ones have sprouted from those ashes. This time they were nowhere nearly my fault, but simply because someone's ego has blown up so much that is is about to burst from the seams. So, you think you are above the class? You think your social virginity is more holy than our vulgair behaviour? No. You are not holy, nor virgin, nor much more intelligent than we are. Oh yes, you might have passed one or two more tests than we did and perhaps with slightly higher grades. But how do you enjoy these new developments, of belong along with us in the flock of people who failed this one test? And how dare you flame at your own friends for it? It's not their fault, arse. And leave -my- friends alone too, or I I will give you a horrorshow mighty tolchock on your merzky litso.

In the meanwhile I am sitting sick at home. Yesterday I was complaining about how I didn't want to go, but yeah... Sometimes you get what you wish for, though those things aren't often pleasant. On the way home my bowels suddenly started some riots with all explosive and violent effects to deal with. Oh and the non-existant lord grant me mercy, I was still two hours away from home, leaving me no choice but to make use of the train's doubleyou cee. I am convinced that I now not only have explosive bowels, but also some alien disease.

And with this rant finished, I shall close off with one final random statement: WE'RE HAVING SAUERKRAUT FOR DINNER, FUCK YEAH <3

What sits there all in an English breakfast?

2009-11-16T12:25:00.000-08:00

Jesus H. Christ on a cracker, if I ever meet someone in real life with English grammar like that... Murder WILL commence. My own English hasn't been the best of late due to an extreme cause of lazyness and lack of give-a-damn, but come ON. Don't you listen to the television? Don't you listen to the lyrics of songs? Don't you read English everywhere in the world these days? Have you ever heard a ridiculous sentence like that in a sane piece of text? No. NO!

And now, the Middle Ages. Every new class we have to bring forward important events and persons from that era, like Alexander the Great for the Romans, Machiavelli for the Renaissance, William the Silent for Dutch history, etc etc. But... But when they asked us about the Middle Ages... *Insert sound of chirping crickets here*. Seriously nothing happens in the Middle Ages except for like... monks and monestries. How INTERESTING for a non-believer.

KRAWWWWLING IN MAI SKINZZZZ, THEM WUNDS DEY WILL NOT HEALLLLL. Which is an indication that my November angsty emoness is still raging. Oh, I wish it was December yet. Then it will be December angsty emoness, it's very closely modelled on the November angsty emoness but... Not quite the same. At least December has Sinterklaas and Christmas, the latter being less whooptiedoo for emotional lurnerlynezz. Yeah, my family will be visiting and we will be having the most delicious 'stamppot' dinner, but... Muh! It's not as if I'm particularly fond of my family, especially two of them with whom I'll most definitely be having a fight again because they are so confinced they are superior to me. BUT NOBODY IS SUPERIOR TO ME, FOOLS, HAAAAHAAAAHAAA-*chokes on cough* I want to cuddle on the couch and watch sappy movies and berlejrkehjt. I'll be single forever. FOREVER! Unless I lose weight. But... December = Sinterklaas = chocolate = fat. December = too cold to go outside = no exercise = MOAR FAT. And losing weight = exercise = either boring or = expensive. Bah. I'm doomed, I tell you, DOOMED.

And my new timetable sucks. What do you mean, class on Mondays?! What do you mean, class on Thursdays?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN CLASS FROM HALF 3 TO HALF 4?!

This blog. It contains too much capslock.

Lelelelelele

2009-11-09T06:04:00.001-08:00

I scored an 8 for Dutch History! Yaaaaaay~! *Runs around flailing arms* That is, if I hand in my portfolio this week. Portfolios! BAH! And now I'm sitting here waiting until I have my meeting with the dean, which is in 25 minutes. And suddenly I find myself being very 'melig', which is a bit sad because I'm here in the Media Centre on my own. Well, not really on my own but on my own as in there is nobody here I know. Or maybe I do know but... Oh well!

I had my dorko moment this morning quite early already. Actually it started yesterday evening. Today's exam/convo was at 11:30 so I typed that in on the public traffic site. Or did I...? Because suddenly I found myself at the train station at a quarter to eleven and I suddenly wondered since when it took the train half an hour to get to Zwolle. I TOOK. A TRAIN. TOO. GODDAMN LATE! Well not a real biggie because I just joined in on another group but I -did- miss the conversation with the teacher about the exam. Which was mainly because they had gone ahead of me and went into another classroom so I couldn't find them -_- Thanks very much for waiting. Oh well, in the end there was nothing I could have changed anyway. Teacher's will is law, remember that kids. And I guess that no matter what that teacher had said I would have just blushes and nodded in agreement. DAMMIT! It's not fair to disarm with looks.

So, I'm eating Samson&Gert cookies in a university's Media Centre... And of course I suddenly find myself having an immense BURST of novel-writing-inspiration and I have nothing to write it down ooooon!

Next month I'm going to start going to the gym. Yeah. The Gym, with capitals. It's the liar of my arch enemies. Skinny Barbie dolls will be observing me as I hobble along on the treadmill and hometrainers. But fuck, it's for a good cause. I'm sick of having to drag my weight around with me, or not being able to wear whatever the feck I want. SOON, WORLD, SOON! YOU SHALL OBEY MY BEAUTY AND ALL SHALL FAAALLLL MUWHHHAHAHAHAHAHAH*cough*

The guy next to me thinks he can type faster than I can. We haven't officially started a contest but I can see him sneakily glancing at my keyboard all the time, as if he's wondering whether I'm actually really writing something. Or perhaps he's wondering whether I'm human or not, because I'm so awesome. AWESOME. You know why? Because I scored an 8 for Dutch history, bitches!

And now I want to go home. Huwaaaaaa.

Mission Completed, 9999 EXP Gained.

2009-11-04T13:39:00.000-08:00

I no longer have to see the shrink, the soul pincher, or what ever nickname you like to attach to it. I am sane again! Or that is what we like humanity to think. Everyone who knows me of course knows that sanity and me are like fire and water, like cat and mouse, like... Okay, you get the point. I did have a slight panic attack last week but I was able to correct myself and tell myself that I was thinking nonsense again, which is good enough for me and apparantly for the shrink as well. The fact I've gained a lot more confidence is hard to ignore, for myself and possibly for the outside world. How long can you stand this new arrogance, huh? HUH?!

Meh, of course it's not as if I don't have anything better to do. Tomorrow is the Egypt/Mesopotamia/Greek history test and it kind of sucks how much you actually have to learn for it. The plus side is that, other than with the Roman history test which I majorly flunked, I now sort of now what to study for which makes things a lot less solid and chaotic. Hopefully this will go better.

As if tomorrow's test is the only thing I have worries about... Tomorrow is the day the 'deurwaarder' was actually going to visit and take away my stuff. I've managed to arrange proof that I didn't have to pay the bill, but I have no idea whether those dear tax-people brought that message over to the money-collectors. But then again, the tax-people wanted the money-collectors to get the money FOR them and since they are now aware of the fact they can no longer get it from me, it would be useless to still send them, right? Right...? Bah, the woes of being an adult.

Ahh, November, the time of golden leaves and chilly winds. November of early darkness and necessary umbrellas. November, the month before December and other random poetic nonsense. But most of all, November, the time of nostalgia. I know I shouldn't still think back of then, that I should forget and move on, but I am only human and I am weak. She would have laughed at that weakness, as she now laughs at most things I do, the reason I should most of all forget. But I cannot, and refuse to, forget the better times. The times of November, the times of December, the times of walking around the city in the late evenings with the end-of-the-year lights on, the period of having to be picked up from the metro station to prevent being raped/robbed/etc. Of getting chocolate letters from her mother, of travelling home in the weekend after having proudly bought Christmas presents for my parents, my sister. And the time of returning there from Christmas holiday and having to hear it's over. I that city, I miss you, I miss your brother, I miss your mother, I miss your silly dogs.

My god, I didn't know a 20-year-old could be a sentimental old fool. I really shouldn't watch so many soap operas xD

Also: OH MY LORD THE NEW WHEEL OF TIME BOOK ARRIVED AND I LOVE IT SO MUCH AND EGWENE KICKS SO MUCH ARSE AND SIUAN TO AND OOOHHHHHHH. I'm really glad it was Brandon Sanderson to finish the series, because I can only say I like his style of writing. Yeah, sometimes his vocabulary is a bit too 2oth-century-ish, but it absolutely does not ruin the feeling and atmosphere of the story. It reads away quickly, it's Wheel of Time to the fullest. The only thing that is a MAJOR shame and most likely result of splitting the books into three is that little is actually happening. The Black Tower is not touched and thus neither is my favourite character who in my prejudiced eyes has a -very- important position in the story... And the promised return of my second-favourite character Moiraine has been delayed to the new book as well. Sigh. And so, with more than 60% of reading to go of the current book I am already desperately waiting for the new one, to be released next year. Or so they say.

Here we go again

2009-10-25T16:28:00.000-07:00

Here I am, sitting in the room on my own at half past midnight, eating a tangerine and crying my eyes out because my mother accidentally broke my favourite mug with Paddington Bear on it. Yeah, it's that time of the month again.

On a happier note, and to great request, a blog about my amazing Anglo Adventures! Berdien, Don and I went to visit dear Kees in England to keep her company in the big empty villa while her au pair family was on a holiday. Oh bother, such a burden to bear! How ever could we survive a long weekend in such a big house, all the way in England? I'll tell you exactly how!

The day before we went to England, Berdien and I stayed over at her boyfriend Don's place. We had planned to go to bed really early because we had to take a taxi at 6:30 the next morning, but everyone knows what you get when you put three nerds in one room. Insomnia. We spent most of the time watching silly pictures and went to bed. Next morning we had a very yummie breakfast with appelflappen and croissantjes and then took a fancy fancy white leather taxi to Schiphol. Yeaahhh! My first time on a plane! Snaaaaaakes on a plaaaaane, I seeee snaaaaaakes on a pla-... Sorry.

Schiphol is fecking awesome and humongous! We hung out there before we could board our plane, but not after we had our luggage checked. You know what's ridiculous? You can't even bring a torch. Or an axe. Or radio active isotopes. How on earth do I spend my time on the plane and in England if I don't even have my radio active isotopes with me? Tsssk! Anyway, the plane trip was awesome. It was beautiful to see all the clouds and it really looked as if you could walk on them. Except we didn't really try. It was kinda rainy outside.

We arrived in London Luton, took a bustrip to London Waterloo where we robbed a sushi stor-. eehh, I mean, where we bought our lunch in a sushi store and guess what? We stumbled upon a Kees! What a coincedence! We decided to tag along with her to Horsley after a lot of hassle of finding a litter bin, train tickets and the right platform. The train trip was looong but gezellig, except that all of us were terribly tired. We arrived in Horsley and enjoyed the beaaaauutiful autumn views and the hills and first dragged our massive suitcases on to the supermarket where we bought a month's supply of crisps which we finished in ehm... a couple of hours. Then we had to take a murderous hill into a big arse villa neighbourhood where we couldn't keep our eyes of the awesome houses. We first got a tour, then cleaned the house with our dearest friend Henry, the love of my life. Then we peeled/cut potatoes and apples and started on cooking. When the family came home they all were so very nice and the children were really really cute. Eventually we and the children were on a mission to destroy evidence of three cups of Ben & Jerry's. We devoured them in say, ten minutes. After which we were horribly nauseous. Like, really horrible.

Next day we went to Guildford, which was really really really pretty! Again many many hills which are very bad for lazy people like me, but it was totally worth it. We ate 'mini dutch pancakes' AKA poffertjes and the blasphemous woman selling them wasn't even Dutch! The stand next to her had her husband selling German sausages. I mean, what....? Oh well, British! I bought godmother soap from my new favourite store; Lush and a beaaauuttiful new jumped at the very very very typically British store called......... H&M. I couldn't resist it. And peer pressure, PEER PRESSURE! Linda forced me! And then I was finally reunited with my beloved Sourz in a very hooliganish pub that made us sing the Manchester United song from Eurotrip all day......... And suddenly the Sourz was gone. I blame Henry. We then took a trip home and we dived onto the electic/automatic/chilaxing sofa with a pile of crisps and movies and booze and snakebites and jollyness. Then we ate toad in a hole. Yummmm! Oh and before we got home we experienced a bit of our very own Blairwitch Project in the dark. Except there was no Blair. And no Witch. And no project either.

Next day Linda and I decided to let Berdien and Don have a bit of alone time and sent them off to London while we were having very serious matters at home involving crips, TV, sofa and Hannibal Lecter. The reason we weren't going along to London had nothing to do with us being broke, nothing! We spent out day analyzing cannibals and very serious behaviour, we had some very essential testing of crips, had to review a Disney movie in HD quality, got involved with very heavy chairobics after which it really was necessary for us to do some ritual pancake baking. During the ritual pancake baking we witnessed the glorious and heavenly birth of Balloon Pancake. Unfortunately it had to go back to Pancake Heaven soon before we could take a picture of it. Berdien and Don then returned and we commenced our movie analyzing and went to bed very early. Right. I almost believed that myself.

Uuuuunfortunately the next day was Monday and we had to go home again. We strolled across London, looking like zombies, doing some sightseeing involved the London Eye, Parliament, Westminster Abby and the local Tesco's. But nothing could beat the seagulls and most of all; the arcade! It had DDR! And we spent Berdien and Don's last pounds on those bloody machines that made me sweat like no tomorrow. But then again who wears a woolen turtleneck jumped while playing DDR? Moi. It kicked so much ass that I ordered my own DDR pads. Then we had a bawwwfest supreme and we went back to the airport. Our flight was delayed which was a bit meh, but in return we had a beautiful flight in the dark where we could see the thousands of lights on London. And when we arrived of Amsterdam, but Amsterdam is stupid, ugly and smelly. I then said bye bye to Berdien and Don and took a very very very long train trip home.

And here I am again, being very bored and missing my friends and having to start all over again on my homework because my slutty laptop thought it was fun to crash on me. Daaamnnn youuuu~!

Also: IN TWO DAYS IS THE RELEASE OF THE NEW WHEEL OF TIME BOOK, AAAHHHH! *runs around flailing arms* Hopefully my book will arrive on the actual day of release. And if so; my brain will be shut down until I've finished the book.

And suddenly it's 1 AM. Good night!

PS: OMG I MISS MY PADDINGTON BEAR MUGGGGG WHAAAAHHH. No seriously.

End my sorrrooooowwwww!

2009-10-13T01:08:00.001-07:00

No, I haven't suddenly turned emo and want to take the exit of life, but I'm this extremely boring class being bored to death. Did I mention I'm awfully bored? I should have accidentally overslept this morning, seriously. And I wish it was Fridaaaaaay! First time on a plane, woosh! Wanna bet that I'll get motion sickness and barf all over the place? Yeah. That'll be something for me alright. And then it's time for badgerhunting, because we have to end this terror! We have to prevent all ankles from being nommed!

Amancé and me in class:

Hold my poodle!

2009-10-04T05:06:00.000-07:00

If there is one thing you need to know about me, it's that you don't engage in a debate with me if you value your life. I am merciless. I am inexhaustible. I am destructive. You will LOSE. Unless you're that friend from my previous blog entry ._.

One foolish girl tried to test her luck by challenging me into a debate, or a discussion more likely. Well, en garde my lady, let's battle, even though I will soong grow tired of you. And after five or so minute I did indeed grow tired because, surprise surprise, she ran out of arguments and defenses before that. If there is one thing I despise more than anything else it's people who run around and claiming things and not being able to support their 'awesome-o opinions' and lacking arguments. Even worse is when they'll start to bawww about my cruelty, or rather, their own weakness. Score: 1-0 to me.

Even before Round Two started, you make a fool of yourself. You can't even push your opinion for a grade, you come unprepared but even if you would have done something before hand you would have FAILED. You are like the King Midas of FAIL. And then when you are to receive feedback, because others are more merciful than I am and will pretend to offer help, you will jump on your drama llama and prance away because, oh! How dare they question your Skillzz of Awesome, how dare they give you hints to get better grades! Of course you have to pick up your shield and sword and parry them as if they were some enemy attack. You're supposed to be a fourth grader, didn't they ever learn you to shut up and listen when a teacher is giving you feedback? If you can't handle criticism, then what on earth are you going to do in front of the class? The students will tear you apart like a horde of rabid swines. We were trying to be helpful and what do you say? "But you always have critique on everything!" You dare call me a hypocrite? You DARE?! Bawwing on constructive feedback or partaking in a debate -you- started is the same now? I thought not. Yes, I rant and complain and nag and whine in class and outside too, but I can entertain you for a week with all the arguments I have to go with it. Unlike you, who will sniffle and pout and write 'secret notes' with the classmate next to you about me, because at least your collegue weakling won't tell you the truth. We'll meet again on the battlefield, but for now I'll polish my sword.

MY god, I'm so absolutely bored D:

Nyoro~n

I got stomped. !DRAMA LLAMA SPOTTED!

2009-10-01T12:09:00.001-07:00

Like, really badly. Just now I figured out that one should not start a debate or a discussion with someone smarter than you and especially not political or religious discussions. It doesn't help either when you have a discussion about religion with someone who does believe in a higher power while I myself can't even imagine believing in a god or anything. I can't see why I should believe in an invisable being or person, to put my faith into something or someone who will apparantly 'guide' my life and judge over me while there is never a sign or existance. No confirmation about whether I'm doing it right or wrong, no promises of rewards except what's written in a book 2000 years ago. When I'm in trouble, no matter what kind of trouble, I have to fix it myself. Not my friends, not my parents, not my teachers so why should I then rely on something that's never proven it's existance? Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with other people believing in their own gods and symbols. Hell, I wouldn't even care if they held a mass in the middle of the train station, as long as they let me pass in peace and let me live in non-belief.

This particular discussion my friend and I had was about gay marriage and the acceptation of homosexuality. The main reason it's not accepted in majority of countries is because of religious reason. My question then was, "But why would that god forbid it?" and there is literally no answer to be found, anywhere. Why is it wrong for two men or two women to share their lives? They don't force it upon you, they don't make you live with them in the house, they're not trying to expand their 'dominion' by wanting more people to be gay, unlike religions who just want to spread and spread and refuse to accept people who defy their belief. The friend then asked me, "If people can believe whatever they want, then why can't you let them believe homosexuality is wrong?" and I had no answer for that. I tried and I fought, to my idea I had very good arguments, but he was simply too strong. He kept coming back simply because he can believe in the fact that something is the way it is because god said so. Now, we were discussion this from the Christian point of view and he is Jewish and I don't believe so it was a nasty discussion in the first place, but... Hell, it's so tiring to be bashed down again and again by statements you don't even believe in. I simply no longer had the energy or the confidence to come up with new arguments. It's even worse when you love that friend so dearly, you can't even get angry because he dos believe and you don't.

And then when I told him I couldn't believe I lost the discussion, he said there was nothing to lose because this was simply a philosophical discussion with a friend. He's right. But then he dared to ask, "I'm a friend, right?" Such foolishness. There isn't probably a friend more dear to me. Not only did I, to my feelings, lose an important discussion, but apparantly I've also not given enough proof of how much I care. And I don't mean that in the sense if 'pity me, I'm a lousy friend', but in the case of 'pity him because he still has doubts over my friendship'.

Drama Llama blog out.

There we go again.

2009-09-30T23:52:00.000-07:00

My dearest bladder has once again given me the proof I am an infection on legs. I'm not human, I've just taken that form to deceive everyone. One day, when enough sarcrifices have been made, I shall free myself from the flesh and rule the world. The world, I tell you! MWUUAUAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

In the meanwhile I shall start on my antibiotics...

THIS IS....!

2009-09-30T10:53:00.000-07:00

Sparta indeed, but I have little good to say about it. About that movie '300' at least. I think I'm slowly turning into a history snob or something but watching a historical novel turned into a movie right after you've had a class about that subject is going to make everyone into one. This was a typical case of not "This is Sparta!" but of' "This is Hollywood!". The thing that annoyed me most was the fact it was apparantly normal for them to go to war in a single red cloak and leather underwear. A magnificent fake sixpack is hardly going to protect you from arrows, spears and swords. And how come everything these days has to be smeared with this poo-like colour filter? Yes, it makes things a lot darker and eerier, but also more po0-like. And and and and... The only drop-dead gorgeous Spartan did indeed drop dead, after he got decapitated. I will sit in a corner and pout now.

So, the change from English to History has almost officially been done. Both departments are informed about it now and all I need to do is gain up on last year's methodology and pedagogueshit and finish the minor. Of course my parents were being a bunch of non-understanding shrimps again, going all berserk over me "not knowing what I want". I know very well what I want. I want to be a teacher and I'm going to be one, I just changed subjects. It makes me even more annoyed to know that they're quite proud if my sister's education change and she switched schools THREE MONTHS before GRADUATION.

Next on the list of ranting: the prejudices about the Netherlands. I can't even mention the country I live in to outsiders without being called a stoner or a whore because that's apparantly what we're known for. First I thought it was just the shallow minority without brains but now even my best friend from America with a brain capacity bigger than all the people I know combined holds these prejudices... I've lost my hope for a positive image of the Netherlands, all because of one damn city. Yes, Amsterdam, you've damaged us and I'll never forgive you. What's so special about that city anyway? It's not particularly pretty, it doesn't have too much impressive shops (80% is a complex of McDo's or some other foodstand), it smells bad and looks bad because there is litter everywhere and the latter is tourists included. All the prejudice about drugs being allowed in the Netherlands is complete nonsense because not only is it -not- allowed, but 90% of the stoners are actually tourists. Save the Netherlands! Please!

Last but not least: the goddamn bus. If it's not too full for me to go along, it's stuck in a traffic jam so I'll be late for school no matter what. GRRRR!

And now I ran out of things to rant about! *gasps like a fish on the land* I can't live without ranting! Noooo! Noooooooo...! Noooo-ooo-o--o-o....!

THIS IS THE END OF MY BLOOOOOOOOGGGGGGG! *gives it a kick so it goes online*

Result!

2009-09-28T03:51:00.001-07:00

My next appointment with the 'soulpincher' isn't until next month, which means positive progress, yay! First I thought it would turn out as a disaster, especially after the first meeting with the guy, but it all turned out just fine. I've gained a lot of confidence in the last past months and I've learnt to see things in a more positve way. Of course I've always been brilliant, I just needed to realise it myself.

And I actually don't feel like blogging today, so bye!

White 'n nerdy

2009-09-20T12:18:00.000-07:00

They see me rollin', they hatin'!

This weekend was Abunai!, an anime convention that's annually being held relatively close to where I live. Unfortunately it's still not close enough to travel back and forth so I stayed over at a friend's place, which was very very very amazing. Not only were the people in the house very open and friendly, but the house itself... Woah. I got lost on the way to the toilet and I'm really not kidding. You need GPS to find the exit, I swear!

Okay, maybe not.

I decided not to drag my cosplays along because I didn't think the weather would be fit for it (and I had to go to school late so I would end up in the classroom and people would look at me thinking I'm going to move into the school. Which would fail.) so of course the weather had to backstab me and be beautiful. And boy, was I sorry. This was only my third con and I've always cosplayed before so this time it was quite... boring. I felt like an outsider really, as the only 'sane' person on the outside while I'm just as white 'n nerdy on the inside as all the rest. I did wear my kitty-eared headband (which earned me a hug from a complete stranger who "always wanted to hug a neko!!!"), but still. Other than random fangirl squeeling and whining and bitching about sore feet and backs we wasted a month's studyfinancing in the dealerroom after having stood in the queue for one and a half damn hours. Imagine being trapped in the middle of a bunch of sweaty cosplayers and annoyingly loudly squeeling fangirls in a no-ACed hallway. Yeah. Then we went drama-lama spotting and found two excellent examples which we then /ignored with a lot of lulz, they were totally having a lonercon. In the meanwhile we held a deodorantcon, wardrobecon and the most spectacular feature of the year; toiletcon, which attracted more people than the actual Abunai! con. We should charge next time.

Other highlights:
- Meeting friends from former cons
- Swirls
- TAIKO CONCERT FTW.
- Swirls
- Our homemade failbento
- Swirls
- Funny black woman jokes: "HOLD MY EARRINGS, there's gonna be some serious ass whoopin'!"
- Swirls
- Fail highfives
- Swirls
- YAOI MANG OH YEHHH. And my new Elizabeth Hawkeye keychain.
- Choking on a Swirls because of funny comments by funny people

Also, we got Rickroll'd :( It came so unexpected, there was no way we could have avoided it. Perhaps I should discuss this with my therapist before this goes out of hand. 'Fo 'Sho Bro. Next time I will cosplay, as 'Olivia Milla Armstrong' from 'Full Metal Alchemist'. Google eet, you leezy beeyotch. My mum loves the outfit, which is good, because she's gonna be makin' it. Teehee.

One more thing before I go to bed and recover from my con-exhaustion. When I got out of the bus and wanted to mount my steel mount AKA bicycle I had to look for my keys. I did and found them and when I looked up I had the most amazing conversation of the day:

Spider In Web: O HAI!
Me: OH SHI-.

If I had taken one more step I would have had a spider on my nose. Some pity please.

- Elmida

PS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4qicK39ISc

Do not want!

2009-09-16T04:29:00.001-07:00

Dear Microsoft,

What is this fuckery?! There is a reason I refused to install your fancy new Windows Live Messenger, you know? Not everyone is very interested in flashy and in-your-face designs, some people just want to use MSN to chat and do other simple things. Why do I first have to delete fifty billion useless bars, flashing updates and stupid add-ons before my messenger feels a bit usable? Why do the avatars suddenly have to stand on the left, with ugly green-orange-red coloured borders? What was wrong with having them on the right? Why can I no longer put my status on 'out to lunch' or 'on the phone'? I can put my status on 'busy' or 'away' now but people have no idea for how long that is! And then why is 'busy' red and 'away' orange? Orange gives me the impression of "Well, I'm sort of here, I'm not giving you the green light to talk to me but I'll answer slowly because I'm busy." while red tells me "I'M NOT HERE. DO NOT TALK TO ME. RED LIGHT. DO NOT WANT." And why do all my texts appear below each other in stead of separated? Now it's just one big block of text. And why do I first get 'pictures', 'activities', 'files', 'games', and all those sort of shit and are 'invite' and 'block' hidden in a drop-out menu? Aren't those functions much more important in a conversation?

And the most ridiculous part of this all: why, WHY do you FORCE me to download your latest fancy 13-year-old MysSpace-freak version of MSN Messenger?! There are computers that aren't even compatible with this bullshittery version, like my mum's pre-historical computer. What, is she no longer allowed to be online because she's not 'modern' enough? BULL. CRAP. OF. THE. CENTURY.

Greetings,

- A user who does know about usability and you obviously don't.

Ha, you thought you were rid of the ranting, were you now dear readers? No, it's never done with me. NEVER. Today I had to go to the hospital to have a x-ray of my stomach done. First they sent me to the wrong section because I thought I had to get an echo. Confusing! When I finally arrived at the right spot, I had to get completely undressed o_o' After having confirmed there was no way I could be pregnant (unless I'm a Holy Virgin) my stomach got radiated with radioactive rays and other unhealthy crap I was was gone within five minutes. And I had to miss an entire damn day of school for that! Friday I'll get the results of the x-ray and the blood test. If I happen to have a food allergy, I'm going to throw a hissy fit. Seriously.

Abunai this weekend!

- Elmida

Cool Story, Bro!

2009-09-12T08:11:00.000-07:00

And so far I have survived my first week robbed of the free time I used to have. Even though I now have to get up at 5:00 AM in the morning and spend more time in public traffic than anywhere else, I can't say I dislike it. So far I am in complete awe about the complete amazingness of the History minor. So many nerdy facts I've learnt! It pleases me to know that I can bore the people around me with even more senseless facts :3 I think that if it stays this awesome I will get a humongous dilemma because I'm afraid I like History better than English. Meh!

Since a while I see a shrink and some other therapie called 'haptonomie' which really help me get my confidence in order. Ever since I started going there I feel quite a bit better and have a lot more energy to do things because now I can go to sleep without getting immense panic attacks. Unfortunately I think I need to see another professional; a dietician. Yes, I am overweight and I have to and want to do something about it but it's very complicated. I take ~1000 calories a day where I should be taking 1400. I seriously can't bring myself to eat more unless I want my stomach to explode like the USS Enterprise after an enemy attack and unless I spend 24/7 in the fast food restaurant I won't name because the thought of the trademark clown scared the shizzle out of me. And also, everytime I eat something with grains (bread or pasties or what) my stomach gets upset af if I've just eaten green eggs and blue ham.

And you, person who doesn't know he's the one I'm talking to, how dare you seduce me unintentionally?! After I've finally gotten over the whole stuff, how dare you keep me awake at night and make me daydream all day? GRRRR!

- Elmida

Historia Magistra Vitae Est

2009-09-08T12:04:00.000-07:00

Ha, what a fancy way to start a blog. This quote (by Cicero according to Wikipedia) was found at the bottom of the History minor's reader and since I'm a Latinphile... Why not! A cookie for anyone who guesses it's meaning. Hint: Google.

Today was my first day back in school and it was as if I had never left. Getting up at bloody 5:00 AM in the morning is still a pain in my oversized arse, I still park my bicycle at the same spot, it still takes ten minutes to cross the road in order to get to the bus stop and risk to miss it and I still get nauseous in the bus while reading the newspaper. Now I think of it, I forgot to read my horoscope this morning. Oh. MY. Lord. Tradition c-c-c-c-combo breaker!

At the train station I met two of my classmates who joined me on the History minor. It was nice to not have to arrive in awkward silence because I didn't know anyone. But then again, I'm so amazing and charming that I would have easily gathered a new posse around me, naturally. The class itself was quite nice, though the teacher was a dork and all the information we got was a bit too shallow for what I wanted to learn. But hey, it was the first lesson and very obviously also this teacher's first time teaching. The poor thing. How will he ever deal with those devious and those 'bijdehande' HBO students? To be continued.

And last but not least; a rant. I want new mangas! And yes, you perverts, you all know what kind of mangas I prefer. The nasty thing is that I can't buy them in the regular manga store (fuck you, Comicasa, you do sell that -other gender-) so I'm limited to the twice-a-year conventions. It so happens that there is a convention in two weeks I'm going to, but these kind of actions sort of make me feel like I'm buying something illegal .____.

Also, I want a boy/girlfriend. Nao. You can apply for it through my e-mail. I am not responsible for any harm done, either physically or mentally. Or financially, teehee.

- Elmida

EDIT: Oh gosh! I have been granted with time-travelling abilities! According to blogger.com, I posted this blog at 12:04 while it's obviously 21:37 in Hollanda...