Like, really badly. Just now I figured out that one should not start a debate or a discussion with someone smarter than you and especially not political or religious discussions. It doesn't help either when you have a discussion about religion with someone who does believe in a higher power while I myself can't even imagine believing in a god or anything. I can't see why I should believe in an invisable being or person, to put my faith into something or someone who will apparantly 'guide' my life and judge over me while there is never a sign or existance. No confirmation about whether I'm doing it right or wrong, no promises of rewards except what's written in a book 2000 years ago. When I'm in trouble, no matter what kind of trouble, I have to fix it myself. Not my friends, not my parents, not my teachers so why should I then rely on something that's never proven it's existance? Don't get me wrong, I'm fine with other people believing in their own gods and symbols. Hell, I wouldn't even care if they held a mass in the middle of the train station, as long as they let me pass in peace and let me live in non-belief.
This particular discussion my friend and I had was about gay marriage and the acceptation of homosexuality. The main reason it's not accepted in majority of countries is because of religious reason. My question then was, "But why would that god forbid it?" and there is literally no answer to be found, anywhere. Why is it wrong for two men or two women to share their lives? They don't force it upon you, they don't make you live with them in the house, they're not trying to expand their 'dominion' by wanting more people to be gay, unlike religions who just want to spread and spread and refuse to accept people who defy their belief. The friend then asked me, "If people can believe whatever they want, then why can't you let them believe homosexuality is wrong?" and I had no answer for that. I tried and I fought, to my idea I had very good arguments, but he was simply too strong. He kept coming back simply because he can believe in the fact that something is the way it is because god said so. Now, we were discussion this from the Christian point of view and he is Jewish and I don't believe so it was a nasty discussion in the first place, but... Hell, it's so tiring to be bashed down again and again by statements you don't even believe in. I simply no longer had the energy or the confidence to come up with new arguments. It's even worse when you love that friend so dearly, you can't even get angry because he dos believe and you don't.
And then when I told him I couldn't believe I lost the discussion, he said there was nothing to lose because this was simply a philosophical discussion with a friend. He's right. But then he dared to ask, "I'm a friend, right?" Such foolishness. There isn't probably a friend more dear to me. Not only did I, to my feelings, lose an important discussion, but apparantly I've also not given enough proof of how much I care. And I don't mean that in the sense if 'pity me, I'm a lousy friend', but in the case of 'pity him because he still has doubts over my friendship'.
Drama Llama blog out.
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